The Narrow Way Travellers

The way is steep, and rocky. The path is narrow and easy to wander from. The fields on either side are lush and green, and the view worthwhile if you know where to look, and what you’re looking for. But yes, the way is narrow and hard to follow. The wide, smooth road is much easier to walk, and it always seems so closely parallel to the narrow path, but the destinations are so different.

Grace is God’s gift to us, grace to walk the narrow path, to climb the treacherous hill. It’s so easily received, once we know what we have. Grace pours down like rain once we recognise it. It falls like asphalt to smooth the small, faltering steps we take.

Grace is the most costly of all the things God has given. The ease with which we accept it is overwhelming, the cost and brutality through which it is supplied is an ongoing wound. So easy to take, but it cost so much to give.

How do you respond to such a gift? The gift of a narrow road, but a priceless destination? The gift of the One Who Travels With Us, the gift of the One Who Came To Open The Gate, the gift of the One Who Provides Every Strength we need along the way?

The gift we have to offer in return is a gift in kind. For His great cost we find ourselves at the precipice of Great Cost ourselves. Ours is the gift of Discipline, the Way of the Disciple. For in accepting Grace so easily, we must choose to offer the painful sacrifice of Being-A-Disciple and all that it entails, and so experience in a small way the pain of the Father.

The Way of the Disciple is to find the Character (which comes from perseverance) to pursue the steep path, the Vision to see what God reveals along the path, so unique to each one of us and yet each sight an intimate revealing of the Father. The Hope to walk still when the steps are lit only one by one, and when the Way is lonely.

The Way of the Disciple is to accept and know loneliness as being without the company of other travellers. To learn the discipline of hearing the Master’s voice. To learn obedience. To learn to Love holiness and integrity. To pursue them with wold abandon. To choose others, to lose your life willing in the act of serving Others.

The Way of the Disciple is to lose your life not in martyrdom but in selfless expression of the Saviour’s Love. It is a great pain, a living wound. But where there is hurt, love, and you will find there is no more hurt, only more love.

There are many who choose the way of the field. The lush green grass between the narrow road and the smooth. They travel close enough to the narrow that they are ever at the edge of losing their footing, stumbling back onto the narrow way. Creating new scars that show they belong to Christ.

The Way of the Disciple, the gift of Discipline is our costly gift to God, and the easy acceptance of His grace becomes greater and greater as you go. The burden becomes indeed light, as the path reaches new peaks and greater heights. Each step strengthens you for the next, and your scars become the signs that show; you are a Narrow Way Traveller.

onward, to the distant shore
onward to my Father’s house
to a land I’ve never been
places only Heaven sees

to this day, I pledge my sight
not to close or turn my eyes
from the path, so steep inclined
this the narrow path I find

to the clouds of greatest sorrow
still I know my Saviour’s pain
and the Gospel Love’s companion
shapes my faith, my heart, my soul

find me climbing in the morning
taking step by step in starlight
for I travel where He leads me
on the narrow way I go

there He finds me, there He lifts me
with His hand so strong and still
bears me onward when I falter
when I fear and fail Him still

still I choose You, dearest Saviour
still I choose this rocky way
by my scars Lord, does Love grow here
so to love and bear Your name

love grows quickly by the hour
deeper still as yet I climb
hand held tightly to my Saviour
arms outstretched on either side

bring me Lord to your good measure
teach me wisely teach me well
let me learn the path so holy
help me climb that narrow way

grace that holds me while I tremble
lets me lean on Hope and Faith
grants me peace when storms are raging
grace that leads me on the way

When You Don’t Find What You’re Looking For In The Usual Places..

I’m going on a journey with a good friend at the moment. I’ll say that it’s a journey we’re on together, because I’ve taken the liberty and he’s created the opportunity for a commitment to walking the path with him.

Sometimes life takes unexpected turns, and the boundaries you grew up building your life inside need to change, because life is bigger and messier than what those boundaries allow for.

It reminds me of the Fences & Wells picture. You don’t need boundaries if you dig deep enough wells. The cattle learn for themselves to stay close to the source. Boundary lines and fences create false realities. You might be perfectly safe within the lines, but you still need to know where to find the Living Water.

Epidemics of the young adult community could be described and defined by the exploration of a couple of ideas that keep floating around my brain; ideas that are all part of the latest journey I’ve committed to being part of.

1. Being a “young adult” is a transition and not a lifestage.
Basically – being a young adult is being on the way to something else – adulthood. Adulthood carries all the implications of development, responsibility, understanding, cognitive thinking ability, recognition of risk and assessment etc. When you start to treat this transition period as a “stage of life” ministry, you actually inhibit the need for ‘graduating’ from adolescent development to fully-fledged adulthood, hence trapping mid-late 20-somethings into post-juvenile behaviour patterns and sociological norms.

2. Theological understanding still does not correlate to “relationship with God”.
There are still too many people in my own generation that can discuss theological moots at length and feel self-satisfied at the end of it. However, the ability to discourse with theological, even ‘spiritual’ prowess is moderately hampered when it comes to relating to a God that operates and calls His followers out of the boundary lines of ‘normal society’. This creates an uncomfortable tension for thinking believers when confronted with a faith that requires them to re-create the canvas of their lives. Our approach to spiritual education and development has left people theologically equipped but life-application deprived. When challenged to seek God’s direction, they stumble to find how to pray, how to listen, how to interpret and especially how to wait. The ancient practices of holiness and devotion are almost completely foreign.

So, one could say that there is little impetus to ‘grow up’ and even less practical, common societal education about how to ‘grow up’ without replicating the boundaries found common in the lives of parents, church leaders, society leaders.

The issue here, and that is common to the journey that brings me to this point – is that the mere replication of the behaviours, beliefs and practices of our parent’s generation isn’t the goal. The world has changed so dramatically since the 1960s that it would be imprudent to imagine God’s outworking in the world hasn’t expanded in all the same ways that our basic human expression & communication habits have.

Therefore…
When you’ve looked in all the usual places for the pathway of your life, for the vision, the purpose, the call, to find the ‘river’ so to speak .. and you’ve come up trumps…. how do you go about digging a well (I suspect that the well looks a lot like some basic disciplines) while you take down the fences… all the while trying to impart bravery and courage to the one for whom parameters and expectations are slowly shifting.

You start by looking in the unusual places. Ok, we’ve done that. Now the next exciting part of the journey begins.

In Other “Thinking News”

Aw, shucks. Etnobofin has tagged me with one of these…

A couple of days ago Marko was tagged as well, so I’m feeling a little overwhelmed by the calibre here! However, let’s face it .. these are more of a gimmick than anything else, but I’ll happily play along. Here’s how it works; the participation rules are simple:

1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think,
2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,
3. Optional: Proudly display the ‘Thinking Blogger Award’ with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn’t fit your blog).

So.. here are the “thinking five”… (in the interests of being honest, I HAVE to revisit…)

1. PostSecret – this is consistently challenging, invigorating and inspiring pop culture.
2. Mark Oestreicher – now a friend, as well as one of a small number of ‘thinking’ youthworkers. We need more people who will engage with the science & the faces of youth ministry.
3. Stu McGregor – I don’t always agree with Stu, but I certainly appreciate his unique and strong perspectives on theology, community and youth ministry. His journey into the next phase is going to be worth walking alongside.
4. Paul Windsor – Principal of Carey Baptist College and one of the practical theologians and hymn-lovers I respect so much.
5. …. I’m going to have to decide tomorrow.

Thoughts That Need Some Space To Live. Reflection Invited.

brian winslade says that i’m a stream-of-consciousness communicator. this is true probably 90% of the time. but there are moments, late at night, when my journal becomes a very structured record of what’s going on. then there are times like this where it just feels like there is so much crammed in my head, some of these thoughts need space to live somewhere outside of my brain.

1.
make sure there is always someone in your life you’d be willing to lay yours down for. it’s a humbling way to keep your own priorities in perspective. friends to die for are friends worth living with. find them and learn to love them really well, how they need to be loved. you’ll be filled with love in the process.

2.
fall in love on a regular basis. it will change your perspective. fall in love with people, your family first – only fall in love with one lover at a time – then your friends. they are who makes you, shapes you and tells you the truth most often. you need to love them enough to listen. fall in love with ideas, ideals and the bigger picture. hope in the more eternal things will give you perseverance in the day-to-day. fall in love with the small moments that make your heart big – places where you find generosity, peace, love and good wine.

3.
get a big God. one that isn’t scared of impossible and unimaginable things. too many of us live with a little itty-bitty God that can’t seem to handle the things we battle with. so we work too hard protecting and defending our little God from the things that don’t really matter, and make a poor name for ourselves in the process. get a big God that isn’t bothered by the small stuff – for Greater is He that is in Us, with Us, alongside Us – than he that is in the world. (thanks Rob Harley)

4.
be a river, not a flood. floods sure have bulk, and impact – but they run without purpose and stop only when they can go no further and they’ve covered everything with messy water. rivers cut a course through the earth, can shift direction, bring life and fertility to the earth surrounding them, rather than destroying life. being a river reflects a willingness to leap into the stream, to find direction, to lead and let others follow you, to be comfortable with responsibility, prepared to grow up. being a river reflects a certain amount of clarity and purpose. a flood goes everywhere in confusion until it stagnates, but a river is always moving.

5.
where there is a vision, a purpose, a call – there is clarity. if there is no clarity, put your tools down until the vision becomes clear. there is no timeline but God’s on a vision that is truly from Him. plenty of good ideas disguise themselves as vision until the moment where clarity is required comes. clarity is a close friend of wisdom, mercy and grace. it doesn’t always mean everything is clear all at once, but clarity is actually only required step by step. faith takes care of the rest.

6.
believe in someone & find people who’ll consistently offer up their belief in you. believe in God, that will give you hope. believe that together you can make a difference that will change at least one person, and maybe affect the world for the rest of us, the universe for the rest of time. humanity finds itself perfected in a partnership with divinity.

7.
consistency and integration are key to surviving life with hope, effectiveness and a growing faith. you’ve got to learn not to be blown around in the wind of people-pleasers or hidden agendas. openness and honesty about what you’re looking will go a long way in regards to finding it. once you learn to stand on your own two feet you’ll be surprised how much you can lean on the people who’ll be drawn around you.

8.
learn to say what you mean, when you need to say it. speaking hard truths in love requires practice so it does little good to wait until the measure of your wisdom gives you undue confidence in the endeavour of loving people well. being practising now, so that as your wisdom grows, so does your ability to share insight.

A Big Space Of Empty Going Nowhere Fast
The weeks after Eastercamp are always strange and new for me. No one year follows the same pattern of ‘winding down’. Usually there are a few glum days, and a few days where the feedback piles in on top of me, followed by a few indignant days while I wrestle with the theology often presented to me in that feedback.

This year though, as with so many years past, there is a healing process that transpires in a little cafe in Mt Eden called Circus Circus. Many of the Eastercamp dreams have been birthed sitting in the low-slung narrow pavement facing seats, looking across at the Eden Methodist Church building on Ngaruahoe St watching the world go by.

So on Friday, when I was decidedly blue and funky, instead of going home, where the kind office boys sent me.. I ended up there instead. 3 long blacks, 4 and a half hours and pages and pages of journalling later.. I left feeling just as blue as before but much much less alone.

I don’t know if it’s simply the busyness of Mt Eden Village, or that familiar faces and friends passed me by as they went about their business, but sometimes sitting in a place like that for a few hours is just what the doctor ordered when it comes to celebrating the work that was, and birthing the work to come.

So many people have asked me whether or not this camp was the best ever. I think I would like to say that it was a great camp, but not the best yet.

It’s The Lonely
For me it’s the lonely hours between sleeping that are the worst in these days. I feel like I am my most complete self when I am working with and leading my crew and watching, listening and responding to young people hearing the Gospel for the first time, alongside youthworkers and leaders who are seeing it with desperately needed fresh eyes. Once everything is packed away and there’s nothing left to it anymore..

I miss the familiar faces, the voices, the smell of closeness with the dearest and best people I know over those days. There are some of the best friends I know who sacrifice so much of themselves over that weekend because they are loving serving my dream and my passion for this camp. They work so tirelessly on my team and they love it. I am blessed beyond belief .. Surely it’s nothing of my hand in this, because I am undeserving of such loyalty.

I miss the ‘standing alongside’ element of it all. That the dreams and God ideas that take shape in my head then take on arms and legs, and I stand alongside the people that carry them out, and that God uses as instrumental in the process. I miss that so much.

Those that come to camp will never know the depth and the significance of the love that the crew pour out on them. They pour out over one another, and over the place. If there was ever an example of building an atmosphere of praise, where the tangible presence of God could be seen and experienced.. then it happens in the team that makes it all happen. And that is a good, good, good thing.

Let The Bells Go Ringing
It used to be that when you got engaged, you rushed out and booked venues, dressmakers and starting choosing china patterns. Seems more like these days before you even go couples shopping for the ring, you get yourself a joint email address. And that’s the way it goes.

Eastercamp 2007
It was an incredible 5 days. Find someone who went and get a story out of them. I’ll tell my stories later. I was glad to have Mic Duncan and Marko with us. Especially to have the whole Oestreicher family. They were a bunch of fun.

Responses & Altars
People are starting to let their comments about camp filter through – and the feedback about the ‘lack of response times’ is really interesting. There were actually plenty of responses, and the counselling room was opening just about every session.. so I’m not sure whether it’s the kids or the leaders who are bothered by the shift.

Team
I have the most amazing team of people and my love for them is so large that I can barely express it. The heart and soul people of this team just blow me away, and I think that I am so blessed to walk amongst them.

Coming Home

i see the light rising over the hills
and I know that I’m getting closer
day by day to where I’m gonna be
and I know i’m still far from home
cos I wasn’t made for this place baby
I was just made for you

it’s an alien footprint on this land
and colourful sand flies through my hands
i remember the scent of summer and the
warmth the hands of my father the one time
he held me close to him, so far from home
cos I wasn’t made for this place baby
I was just made for you
home is just around the corner
in a year or two, sometime i’ll get back home

days crumble into night and I’m all for escaping
there’s no truth to the height of your passion
and the colour of treason you left me behind
the savagery of lovers when they push from the bed
cos I wasn’t made for this place baby
but i’m stuck here to be close to you

i wasn’t made for this place baby
my home is on a distant shore and i’m
not all that certain of how long it’ll be
before i’m home, before i’m free but I’m
pressing on to the truth, to the light and
I know i’m washing you clean, here..
while I’m stuck being close to you…