Leading Me On

tonight at 1am i’m still alive
i can feel it pulsing through my fingertips
a life being breathed in and out of my body
this hope being stirred deep within

tonight at 1am
the moon is a wonderful compass of love
so bright and full and shining down
lighting up the darkness like daylight

tonight we met to write songs, except none of them came easy tonight. The chords were right but the words didn’t sit easy, my melodies were boring and too old, there was too much noise in the room. And in the admitting of the disease of it, I had the opportunity to be lead tonight, which doesn’t happen very often.

I sat back and was lead through a confessing, adoring, sacrifical, honest, deep and heartfelt prayer. It spoke to my spirit and life in deeper ways than the pray-er will ever know. In the depths of the quiet and stillness, with one soft, deep voice uttering the deepest and most precious parts of my whole self, I was taken to the foot of Christ. He confessed for me, our shared dalliance from seeking the kingdom first, renewed my vows of Christ before all else. Commitment to risktaking and living wide was restored. I sat in stillness and quietness and I did not wish to be anywhere else, or with anyone else, or about anything else in that moment, than the pure unadulterated joy of being in the Presence of God. Not just in His Presence, but at His feet, and in His arms all at once. There has been no finer moment of worship in my life for some weeks.

It wasn’t until driving home under the light of the full, bright moon that things started to settle in my belly, heavy and soft. Like something had been birthed there once again. Things are starting to be made new again.