by tashmcgill | Dec 28, 2004 | Prayers, Spirituality
A Christmas Prayer
Lord as we celebrate Your birth
May we live knowing
Jesus, You are our Hope
Jesus, You are our Peace
May we share with all those around us
Family, friends and strangers that
Jesus, You are our Joy
Jesus, You are Love
Great God of love and light.
We remember the star that shone
to first lead people to your Son.
Lead us now, by the light of your love, that
we also may follow you to new life in Him.
Teach us and show us how to live in love
In a world that is filled with violence.
May we be just, truthful and willing to love
All those that we meet along the way.
Those that are filled with sorrow
May they know joy & be comforted
Those that are hungry
May they be fed & be satisfied
Those that are lonely
May they know love & find community
Those that are angry
May they find peace & restoration
May we love freely
And know God with Us
May we give joyfully
And know God with Us
May we receive with wonder
And know God with Us
As we celebrate Your entry into
The human timeline by birth
Messy, complicated, mysterious
May You enter into our lives again
Glory be to God
Amen
by tashmcgill | Dec 22, 2004 | Culture & Ideas, Family
The New Family Christmas
Each year that passes our family christmas evolves a little more. Mum’s partner (whom I adore) has been part of Christmas for many years now, but in recent years his children have become more part of the celebrations as well.
It’s a weird thing. It’s not as simple as adding another gift to the pile under the tree. It raises questions in me that are difficult to answer, and creates strange and conflicting emotions, that are difficult to contain.
It’s never as simple as the love that Mum and her partner share being the complete circle. In fact, that love is like a pebble being thrown into a lake, and the ripples slowly move out to envelop everyone.
The first ripple for me, were the photos of grandkids. Be careful in understanding here. I really like my de facto stepsisters, what little I know of them, and the kids are gorgeous. But it’s strange that the first photographs of grandkids to be displayed in Mum’s house, aren’t our kids.. my kids, or my nieces and nephews.
The second ripple bounces off the first.. because it reflects that the house that was once ours, changes by definition when it starts to belong to other people. See, I want with all my heart to be warm and embracing to the faily newcomers, but the cost seems high. My family home becomes filled with people and photographs of people that begin to belong to this house too.. but I don’t feel like they belong to me, or that I belong to them.
The third ripple is when we start to alter the family I’ve known all my life, to accomodate others sensitivities. This is where I start to chide myself on being selfish and proud. At the family Christmas tree decorating party, Mum put the family photos we had done away, so that said step-family wouldn’t feel left out. But inside I screamed.. I feel left out, of this new family. I battle this.. how to keep the original family sacred, whilst treasuring the new.
The fourth ripple does come down to gifts under the tree. With all my heart, I want to include and embrace this new family, but how do I give a gift to someone I barely know that is meaningful and not tacky, that doesn’t appear contrived or obligatory.
When all the desire in the world is to love, and yet love is painful and uncertain.. how do I do it?
How did Joseph love a son that wasn’t his, as if he was his own? How must Joseph have felt naming that child, in place of his real Father?
Help me God, to love this new family and to be fully part of it, to enjoy everything it has to offer and to make my own contributions to it. Help me not to be angry at what is lost, but to treasure what is gained. May something beautiful grow from the hard soil of my heart.
by tashmcgill | Dec 7, 2004 | Youth Work
Qualified For Ministry.
Today I talked with a friend who’s just been given the boot from a ministry position. It took a really long time for him to get there, both in terms of life preparation, listening to God and then leaping. And it’s never gone as planned. First it was going to be a full time position, and then it was parttime. Now, they don’t want to pay him, but they offered him the 25-35’s ministry to start from scratch.
Granted.. there are many things I don’t know about the situation, and I’ve been really impressed with this guy’s humility towards his leadership, and desire to get the thing sorted out. But there’s been no process. He doesn’t have much understanding of what’s going on, but the Senior already had a meeting with the youth leadership to say what the deal is.
These were the questions I asked him:
Outside of this situation, what’s the whisper of God saying?
What can you do with the time that’s been freed to pursue that call?
What are you prepared to do to follow God in this thing?
How are you relating to God through this whole process?
Unfortunately, this youth pastor isn’t in the Baptist family. Or maybe that’s a fortunately. I know that these things happen still in lots of places, but it’s sad to think that it’s a process he has to go through relatively alone, pretty much reliant on his family to help him through, and trusting the church to demand good process.
Here’s A Potential Generalization, Not To Be Misconstrued
I get concerned about senior pastors leading churches who mistake ‘measures’ for ‘expectations’. It’s a same-old, same-old story. The job description says something nonsensical like ‘see spiritual fruits, young people growing, discipleship’, when the expected visual result is mostly in measures like attendance, rolls, participation.
I suspect that is what’s happening here. A big case of ‘how can we get the kids coming to our programme?’. But the geographical position of this church and it’s local area would reflect a statistically slight chance of it exploding into a major youth ministry. The area is saturated with a number of medium – large size ministries, and critical mass is valid in youth ministry. At each end of the spectrum there are solid, large youth ministries happening with historical credibility. In between are dozens of smaller ministries.
This of course, is irrelevant in the light of what God can do, but the question to be asked, by the senior leadership as well as the youth pastor should really be, what is God doing amongst us, and how can we express that to the community around us?
Count one more for the road, Mike. I just hope that he finds his pathway from here, and doesn’t give up on listening to the Voice.
I’m going to give him some books, and a lot of prayer.
one of our brothers is falling
not because he was careless
not because he wasn’t making the effort
sure, the hill might have been a little slippery
but he was sure trying to stay upright
but now he’s falling, Lord
and someone needs to help catch him
to wipe his tears, to comfort
someone to encourage him back onto his feet
another to pat him on the back
one with a bandaid to put on the wound
a friend to know when it should be exposed
someone to point out all that went right
don’t let him simply hear echoes of words
or the emptiness of where explaining ought to be
help him to keep his ear to the ground
to hear Your whisper for here and for now
keep tomorrow certain in his heart
for we know You are faithful, Lord
mostly Lord, help us remember
that this in itself is not a career
it’s a heartbeat, a calling
and something more earthy.
Lord keep us close as we ought to be
remember our brother, help us stay clean.
Qualified To Theologize
Stu can now blog from anywhere. But is he qualified to blog? By this I mean, Stu’s blog is infinitely more intelligent than mine.. but is he more theologically trained than I? This, I should establish.
Relevant why? Well.. give me a theologian who doesn’t at times get frustrated with the content of many of our worship songs. Give me a theologian who doesn’t sometimes scoff under their breath at the more meaningless, throwaway lines that fill our slick multimedia presentations.
I was talking with one such Songwriter on sunday, where he voiced his growing interest in theology and a certain reluctance to delve too deeply into it, feeling ‘under-qualified’.
Perhaps it’s with undignified restraint that I ramble my meager offerings to this table (of sorts). But that someone should feel so excluded from the gathering.. made me feel very uncomfortable. So theologize, I say. Wholeheartedly and rambuctiously, delve into the deep mystery of our God. Our songs will benefit, as will our dialogue.
So move over. If you are an overqualified theologian, make room at the table for us young’uns.
by tashmcgill | Dec 1, 2004 | Prose & Poetry
Lucidity Speaks
When you speak, how often I must
listen with baited breath
to hear the thing you might say
next, could be funny or serious
off guard, i tend to spend these moments
and makes me like an addict
for I love the rush of blood to my
head when you make me think
before I speak, so I don’t get it wrong
so I don’t regret, but I live regretting
these moments, precious, few
i spend in awe of you, when Lucidity speaks
it reminds me that there’s something in the
air around us that I’m breathing funny
something makes me come alive
ideas that once were silent fly into
the sky that wakes and blinks in
blue hues that colour everything around us
somehow sharper with your eyes wide open
your voice softly speaking things aloud
where I can hear them, over rush of blood
and thought where they are blooming now
in sunshine of your fertilising mind, strange
how coincidence draws you to new places
where I’ve decided I would share a glass
of wine with you that was old, red wine that
I would usually treasure with someone dear
like you could someday be, you shake me.
to invigorating friends, and thinking that shapes me,
to conversations that are fleeting, but enable me to build a
life around me, it’s enabling me to Live.
by tashmcgill | Nov 29, 2004 | Spirituality
I’m Coming Back To This One More Time
Stolen from an old Advent post of Steve’s…these are some good questions to ask..
Am I content with who I am becoming?
I still haven’t figured that out. If I knew what the end result would be, I’d be too concerned with how I figured it out. I’m content with the process I’m in, and with what I am experiencing here.
Am I becoming less religious and more spiritual? (remember the value of context here, please)
I think I prefer this question in the mode of ‘Are my religious practices meaningful?’. And yes, they are. My religious practices are far more related to nature and creative experiences. Late night candles being lit for far off friends. Prayers that are painted and written to answer specific needs. Yes.
Do my family and friends recognize the authenticity of my spirituality?
Most of the time. You should ask them.
Am I generous?
Yes. Mostly. What am I generous with is the question that needs to be asked. With time, but not patience. With experimentation, but not with unnecessary frivolity. With romance and laughter, but not with small talk.
Do I have a quiet centre to my life?
No. I’m looking for one. That will be my whole life journey, but I suspect if I found it, I’d spend the rest of my life feeling off balance.
Have I defined my unique ministry?
No. I’m looking for one. That will be my whole life journey, but I suspect if I found it, I’d spend the rest of my life feeling off balance. I’m content to let the voice of God in the wind direct my ministry path.
Is my prayer life improving?
It’s changing it’s flavour and stance.
Have I maintained a genuine awe of God?
It changes daily.
Is my lifestyle distinctive?
Yes, in good and bad ways. It’s indistinct where it ought to be too.
Is my “spiritual feeding” the right diet for me?
This needs work. I don’t want to be an overactive theologian.
Is obedience in small matters built into my reflexes?
I’ll examine and get back to you.
Is there enough celebration in my life?
I’m adding it constantly, but I think that I’ve recognised the need for it, in my community as well as in my own life.
Answer them for yourself.. maybe post the most interesting answer as a comment..
Being Real.. The Humble Cry Out For An Authentic Life
I’ve never blogged by request.. that is, simply blogged on what someone else has suggested before, but here we go.
The actual thought was on being real in the midst of a crowd, without being swayed in a direction that’s untrue to who you are.
My initial reaction is that the courage to do this is the same as the courage that enables you to go to a movie alone, stand comfortably in a foyer waiting for whomever you’re meeting, to drink coffee content in your own company.
It’s knowing yourself enough to know that you can survive the initial surprise of sharing your thoughts with yourself, and thinking enough of your own opinion to be willing to stand with it, or for it.
Maybe our propensity to be persuaded by the crowd, is more of an unwillingness to think for ourselves.. or to reveal what we really think. I have discovered how easy it can be to go with the flow, critiquing it all the way.
But really.. maybe it just comes down to leaping off the place we are at least certain of, even if unimpressed with it.. and hoping that you really can fly all the way.
I’m listening to the ‘Only Little Boy In New York’ as I type. Being alone in New York, isn’t the same as being lonely. And being alone in your opinion, or your stand isn’t lonely either. Being alone at the altar, being alone in doing the right thing… being the only one in the crowd who honours appropriately.. that’s not lonely.. it’s brave and beautiful.
