Let’s Get More Honest. Again.

Let’s Get More Honest. Again.

I’ve been reflecting recently, on a number of problems I see or experience in the Church (global). In my vocational work, we wouldn’t call these problems. We’d call them opportunities, a chance for someone, somebodies or some new method  to get involved in creating a better outcome.

As I was thinking about the various ‘opportunities’ I can see around me, I realized a lot of these ‘opportunities’ have been sitting in front of us for a while. Since I was a teenager at least, maybe even further back. I think these are opportunities to drastically improve the manner in which we do Church, community and generally go about our business.

Not all of these opportunities will seem initially apparent, but here’s my crack at the first one. Censorship. Let’s knock that one on the head. ‘What?’ I hear you say. ‘Censorship? But how else do we keep our minds and hearts and eyes pure, the eyes are the windows to the soul.” Yes, you’re right.   (more…)

When Jesus Wasn’t Relevant at Youth Group.

The kids are rowdy and excitable this particular Friday night. It’s been a while since I made an appearance at our church community youth programme. Most of these students are between 10 and 15 years old, from a couple of local intermediate schools, friends of friends and a few church community folks as well.

I’m pretty stoked with how this little group is buzzing along – there’s lots of excitement and the leaders are enthusiastic, young and engaged. But I’m not sure they were quite expecting what I pulled outta the bag this youth group night.

For starters, I’m a big believer that when you’re the guest speaker, it’s way easier to go where the kids are, get them to show their colours a little bit and win them over by making sure they’re having fun. I don’t need them to listen to me talk for 30 mins – I want them to be engaged with each other, and with what I’m talking about for ten minutes.

The topic for the night is the one you always get a guest speaker for. It’s not the sex talk, that’s probably still six months away – but I’m talking about the difference between girls and guys, to a motley crew of middle school (intermediate) and junior high kids.

Here’s how it rolled out.

After a few games and snacks; it was “guest speaker” time. I busted the students out; boys on one side of the room, girls on the other. I gave them a couple of big sheets of paper, some pens and asked each group to draw/write/describe their ideal guy & girl. No surprise, the noise and laughter in the room exploded, but not before I gave the leaders some special instructions. Whatever happened, I wanted the groups to be as honest as possible.

About ten minutes later, the activity was done and we pinned those ideals up on the wall. I started out by talking about how everyone’s probably told them they’re at a critical stage of life and that they’re really kinda lucky – because there’s a lot of study going into what’s happening for them. Then I followed through by saying – some of this stuff is helpful for you to know, so you don’t feel caught out by surprise.

I pointed out a few differences between the way each group thought about the opposite sex, but also how they came up with the answers. Here are a few..

1. The girls used dozens and dozens of words to describe their ideal guy & girl; the boys put almost all their energy into drawing rather than words.
2. The boys described lots of activities, the girls lots of qualities.
3. The girls thought the ideal guy had to have tattoos, the boys thought the ideal woman wouldn’t have any tattoos.
4. The boys described the ideal girl as being someone who loved video games, sport, didn’t take too long in the bathroom, wasn’t grumpy and like hanging out with their friends. The girls responded by saying “your ideal girl is just a guy that looks like a girl!”.

Then we talked all the stuff it could mean, as well as some other development facts to reassure them what normal can be. I’m  a big fan of reassuring people when you’re doing any kind of adolescent development talk.

The boys asked a really insightful question: “Why is it when girls are hanging out at school, when a guy walks past them, they all stop talking? And how come girls can be so mean to each other?” I thought that was a great opportunity to talk about the differences between how guys and girls compare themselves to each other. That girls often compare negatively but guys can compare in an affirming way. It was a fascinating conversation.

Then it was time to wrap up the night, with a few more laughs – especially with those boys that had decided Megan Fox was the ideal woman. I was done, and they were off.

It was in the wrap-up afterwards, that I realized a bunch of those young leaders may well have been taken by surprise with the one thing missing. I didn’t mention Jesus, God or God’s creation or sex. I eliminated all the “typical” elements of a Christian youth group Guys & Girls talk. Did you notice it?

Sometimes I think it’s way too easy for us to put a Jesus #hashtag on everything we do in youth group, as if it makes broomball spiritual, or somehow makes what we say to young people more relevant and meaningful. But I suspect, it’s part of what inoculates young people to where and when spirituality might be relevant. So sometimes, I think you can be more meaningful without tagging Jesus in as an after-thought.

What do you think?

Prisoner Or Liberator?

Prisoner Or Liberator?

This picture tells the story of Irma Ivanova, a Bulgarian woman who was arrested for drug trafficking (a charge she denied) in Ecuador and at the time of this photo, in 2007, had been imprisoned for 3 years without trial or verdict in her case.

When I saw it, immediately I was reminded of visiting a group of soldiers imprisoned in Fiji for their role in the coup – detained without trial for 5 years. That visit is one of the most moving I remember.

As I am moving through the Lent season, I am reflecting more and more on the phrase Andrew Walls penned (as far as I’m aware) The Gospel as Prisoner and Liberator of Culture, first in his essay of the same name, which also became a chapter in his book. It’s too weighty a title for me to remember off the top of my head, but to be fair – I think the one sentence is enough. It’s become a bit of a motto as a walk a tightrope of tension in my life. (more…)

Like A Gardener.

Yesterday I was having coffee with my frievnd James. He asked if I had ever been employed by a church and whether or not I enjoyed it. I was watching documentary show on TVNZ6 last night, called My God. It was an interview with a Catholic nun, so long in His service she had retired, some sixty years of life following her vows.
At the beginning these things might have been unrelated, but slowly the threads emerge.


The answer to James’ question is Yes, and sometimes. It got me thinking as I watched the story of this nun unfolding..


1.
In our obsession with youth, we ought to listen more the stories of the truly old. I mean no disrespect but age is the best term.  It seems those older, quieter voices.. the returned missionaries, retired nuns.. those who have witnessed so closely the suffering of humanity and experienced a present God seem to have grasped something in choosing to accept the paradox. They are fully reconciled to God, knowable and unknowable as he is. 


She had such delightfully liberal praxis in regard to the reality of human and faithful life. She decried and mourned the tragedies of sexual abuse in Christian institutions but also expressed empathy and concern for the priests who had struggled to maintain vows of celibacy. She advocates choice… and then said “Of course, the Church doesn’t agree yet, but sometimes we go out in front a little way ahead, and we are allowed to.” She recognizes that the authority and power of her faith comes from outside the institution.


2.
She talked about her garden. When she retired from active service, if you will, she was asked what she would like to do. Gardening and taking care of the outside grounds was her choice. She talked about building hedges to protect from the southerlies. Then we saw pictures of a community garden. Her philosophy was simple.. though she started it, she doesn’t run it. She pays her $10 fee and pays special attention to the compost, because she’s ‘mad about compost’.


 Her theology of gardening was simple and beautiful. We, who began in a garden, can find something uniquely spiritual in the act of tending a garden, growing and nurturing food. Our hands, down deep in the soil, could transcend human experience to touching something of the Creator in each of us. Transcending denominations, institutional religion or no religion at all, the act of gardening is one of the oldest tasks we know. As she alluded, there’s something in that for everyone.  It’s the Imago Dei she’s talking about of course, that part of us that is the Creator sensing the Creator in the earth around us.


3.
When I thought about my seasons working for churches and church organizations, one of the recurring themes is soil. That the times I loved it most and thrived, were the times I had permission to nurture and tend the soil.  Where there was opportunity to grow something, to create something.  


Most plants are small. They are seasonal. They have colour and flavour. Some are just for the fragrance they give to the garden.  Each are distinct. Some keep the bugs away, some attract the bugs. Everything nurtures and enriches the experience of the garden. Even the shit and decay brings richer nutrients into the soil.

So, I desire to minister more like a gardener. Prune a little, shape a litte, plant a little, take a little. Stopping and smelling the roses.

E hara taku toa, I te toa takitahi ēngari he toa taku tini 

(My strength is not from myself but from the strength of the group)

Please follow Anne, Lars, Marko, Adam, Ian and the rest of the YMATH team for their on the ground stories, videos, messages and reflections on being in Haiti. 


Tomorrow morning at 9am EST they are hoping to help get aid to a tent city of some 5000 Haitians as yet unaided since the earthquake a month ago. 


If you don’t do anything else, please at least pray for them and the fingerprints of God.